I didn't realize how distant I've been. Both Sam and Chad called me one of their best friends.
And not recently, I was just thinking about it now. I didn't even realize I was all that close to them.
Sam I could see me becoming really good friends with.
Chad, eh. He's known to be a liar. I'm finished even considering being close to people who can't be honest. But I know he does really care about me and me being safe and healthy. Much more than what I can say for the one who actually caused the majority of my suffering...
But still. Not getting too close. I'm not going to be vulnerable again. What I'm worried about with Sam is that I don't know if Erin is cool with her boyfriends being close to girls. She'd have absolutely nothing to worry about from me (Sam's not the kind of guy I'd date. Then again, I didn't think Brandon was. But Erin is most definitely not someone I'd ever hurt. She's far too incredibly sweet and sincere to do that to.) but I still would want to be sure she's okay with it. She seems like the jealous type.
Off topic. But yeah, I'm really surprised I've been so distant. Usually I'm the one who sees a friend in someone before they do. I guess when you have nothing left in the world, you lose focus.
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