I'm Alive

140am

Sam's almost over Erin. Thank. God. Now I can go back to that empty numbness I used to feel, or rather not feel. I'm sick and tired of the pain.

The situations with Chad shouldn't be a decision. It should be a want. I know my answer now.

I make a lot of dumb mistakes when I type late at night. Like putting in random commas where they don't even remotely make sense or putting in the wrong word. Sorry about that.

Tonight's a really crappy night. My whole body is pulsing and for some reason, I'm in so much pain. Not physically of course. I don't know what's going on.

I... I did it again. I hurt myself again.

I feel so miserable tonight. I wish I knew why.